


Colorblind

by thecoquimonster



Category: Infernal Devices Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-09
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2018-04-19 23:10:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4764524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecoquimonster/pseuds/thecoquimonster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The world is black and white until you meet your soulmate, and when Will and Jem meet, they think that no other colors could possibly exist. </p><p>(they're missing a few)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Graywing the Wise (GoldenRinglets)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoldenRinglets/gifts).



> This is the fic that's ruining my life. It was just supposed to be a short one-shot, like, 5K at the most, but it spiraled out of control. It is Herongraystairs, but Tessa doesn't appear till next chapter (I TRIED, GOD DID I TRY TO MAKE HER FIT...). I hope you enjoy 9.6K of Heronstairs (with a sprinkle of Magnus and others) before I post a second chapter that probably will be as long or longer than this one and yes, will most definitely have lots of Tessa interacting with her boys. I probably won't be updating this for a long while, though.
> 
> I started this out wanting to just write the AU from the point Will and Jem meet Tessa, but my brain didn't really get with the program. 
> 
> Also, shout out to my friend Goldie. I don't know whether I hate her or love her for mentioning "Herongraystairs" and "Soulmate AU" in the same sentence.

For the first twelve years of Will’s life, his entire world was black and white. Literally. That was how it was for every single person until they met their soulmate. Will had heard the names of colors before; blue, yellow, red, green, orange. But he had never seen them. He only knew black, white, and gray.

He thought he would always see the world this way. Colors seemed like a fantasy.

Until he was twelve years old.

It was the first day of school. He was in gym class, sitting down with the rest of the students in a semi-circle while the teacher called roll.

He wouldn’t have normally paid attention, but a singular name at the start triggered a jolt in him.

“James Carstairs.”

“Here,” said a soft voice.

Will looked over at the boy. He was Will’s age, of course. James Carstairs had dark hair. His bangs were a little long, but they didn’t cover his eyes, which gave away Chinese ancestry. James, sensing eyes on him, glanced over to Will. Their eyes met just as James gave him a shy smile. “Call me Jem.”

Will didn’t return the smile, but he kept a neutral expression. Suddenly his vision shifted. He didn’t see everything in shades of gray anymore. It was… different. He blinked rapidly and when it didn’t work, he went to rub his eyes with his knuckles. Another quick glance at Jem told him he was reacting in the same way.

It was confusing. One moment, everything was gray. And then the second he met Jem’s eyes, it was… so different. It was difficult to explain, to process. Will decided it was easier to just keep quiet about it.

“William Herondale,” called the teacher.

“Will,” he corrected, still stunned. Maybe this was what people meant when they said they needed glasses.  

Once the gym teacher was finished with the roll and the warm-up had started, Will ran along with the rest of class. He had always been a fast runner, so he led the class. It wasn’t enough to stop Jem from catching up to him, though. He was huffing and puffing for breath, but he grinned at Will.

“So,” he said, still smiling. Will wondered if he ever frowned. “You’re my soulmate.”

Will tripped over his own foot. A few others in class slowed to make sure he was okay, but most of them just went around him. Jem stopped and looked down at him with concern.

So that’s what it was. He hadn’t even considered it… not many people met their soulmates as young as he was. In fact, one was lucky to even find their soulmate at all. Will was twelve years old, his older sister had recently died, he’d run away from home only to end up in foster care, and right here next to him was his soulmate.

His parents hadn’t told him much about soulmates. They said that when you were born, for your whole life, you see in black and white. When you meet your soulmate, everything in your vision shifts. Everything is beautiful. It’s color. This was what Will was seeing right now. Color. James Carstairs was his _soulmate,_ and this thing he was seeing, it was _color._ This was _color._

You and your soulmate were meant to be.

Will felt terrified. He was only twelve. He’d had crushes before but they weren’t serious; what crushes could be serious at his age? He was _twelve._ And he was already seeing in color. How it terrified him.

He scrambled to get back on his feet. He wanted to get away from James Carstairs. He couldn’t… he couldn’t… he _couldn’t_ —

“We don’t have to be soulmates right now,” said James before Will could start to run again. “We can just be friends.”

“You don’t want to be friends with me, James Carstairs.”

“It’s Jem. And try me.”

Will’s forehead creased. He couldn’t understand why Jem was pushing so hard for this. Well, he could, but they were twelve years old. They had all the time in the world. Why now? Why did he have to meet his soulmate now? Will let out a long breath through his nose. “Race me to that tree. If you win, we’re friends. I win, you have nothing to do with me.”

Jem was unfazed by Will’s harsh tone. He just grinned, eyes gleaming with the thought of challenge. “You’re on.”

They both sped up. Will was sprinting faster than he’d ever run in his entire life, but Jem held up well. He was right on Will’s heels. That wasn’t a win, though. Will allowed himself a triumphant smirk. He was about twenty feet away from the tree when Jem seemed to get a second wind. Will poured on the speed too, catching up to Jem only after he’d passed the tree.

They still had to keep running to the end of the track, where the gym teacher was waiting. The back of Will’s neck was drenched with sweat and he could feel his shirt sticking to his skin. Jem’s hair stuck to his forehead.

Though they were both fighting for breath, Jem kept his smile. He extended his hand. “So…” he had to pause to pant. “Friends?”

Will let out a short cough and reached out slowly. He curled his fingers around Jem’s hand. They didn’t shake, but just held on. Will met Jem’s dark eyes and thought there must be some reason he could see color now. There must be some reason Jem was his soulmate. They could definitely be friends. “Friends.”

~.~.~

“I met my soulmate today,” said Jem at dinner. He looked up from his plate to see his parents listening attentively. They glanced at each other and grinned. His father took his mother’s hand. “His name’s Will Herondale. I never knew color could be so beautiful.”

“The world was always beautiful,” his mother said in reply. “Meeting your soulmate just makes it even more so. How lucky you are, Jem! To meet him so young.”

“We’re going to be best friends,” he announced. “Best friends forever. I know it. I can feel it.”

His father laughed. “You can have him over any time.”

Jem’s wide grin faded to a content smile. He replayed the memory over and over again, meeting Will Herondale’s eyes and seeing the shades of gray turn to different colors. When he’d gotten home, he went on the computer to learn the names of the colors. A lot of the shades of colors looked the same, but blue stood out. Will’s eyes were a striking blue. It was the first color he’d seen. Jem felt it might be his favorite.

~.~.~

Jem was one of the most calming presences in Will’s life. He never pushed for anything, letting Will speak, or not speak, whichever he preferred. At times, Will would finish a new book and talk to Jem about it. Jem wouldn’t interrupt and listened, actually paying attention even though he’d stated multiple times that he wasn’t much of a reader.

“Then what do you like to do?” asked Will, fearing that he dominated the conversation too often.

Jem smiled. “I play violin.”

Will thought back to the time he had tried to play cello back in elementary school. It was difficult and having to practice all the time had been annoying. He wrinkled his nose. “And you like it?”

Jem laughed. “Yes!”

“Are you good?” he asked, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards.

Jem shrugged. “I’m all right.”

~.~.~

Jem blinked awake, hearing someone’s gasping breaths. He rubbed his eyes to clear them from the sleepiness.

“Will? Is that you, Will?” Jem asked in a soft voice. He turned over to see his best friend on top of the extra sleeping bag on the floor. They’d been having a sleepover.

The glow of the television lit Will’s face. They’d nodded off while watching a movie; now all the screen showed was static. Will was curled in on himself, sniffling. He wiped at his face –swiping away tears, Jem realized. It struck him that Will must have been thinking about something truly awful. Will was not one to cry.

“Is something wrong, Will?”

He heard another sniffle. Then: “I’m fine.”

He wanted to ask if Will was sure, if he wanted to talk, if it had been a nightmare or… something. Jem and Will were best friends, had been since more than a year ago when they first met, but it didn’t change that Jem didn’t know all that much about Will. He knew that Will was in foster care, and that his foster parents, Charlotte and Henry Branwell, were as kind and patient as could be. Jem didn’t know what happened behind closed doors, though. But he wouldn’t push. Jem was certain that Will would tell him in his own time.

Instead, Jem simply asked if Will would rather go back to sleep, or watch another movie.

“Movie,” he said, so Jem flashed him a quick, comforting smile and crawled over to his stack of DVDs.

~.~.~

Two weeks later, they were sitting at their usual table in the school cafeteria eating lunch. Usually Will would be chattering about the new book he’d read over the weekend, but today they sat in comfortable silence. Jem’s violin case sat on the table, where it wouldn’t be kicked by other students. He really treasured that thing, thought Will with some affection.  He still had yet to hear Jem play alone. He had come to the school orchestra’s concerts to support his friend, but he didn’t know how Jem would sound without other instruments playing alongside him.

Jem was the one to break the silence. “I have a concert coming up next week. It’s the last one before school ends.”

“I’ll go,” said Will. It was second nature to him by now. Of course he would go to the concert. “What are you doing for summer?”

Jem looked thoughtful. “Well, I’ll be here for a couple weeks. After that, I’m going to back Shanghai to visit family for a month or so.”

“Could I stay at your house for a week or something?” asked Will.

Jem brightened. “Of course! I’ll have to ask my parents, but I don’t think it should be a problem at all.”

~.~.~

Jem was not lying to Will when he had told him that he was all right on the violin. It was how he perceived his own skill. Of course, the harshest critics were oneself. Jem was first chair, first violin. Concert master, technically.

And he was also in the advanced orchestra.

He was always nervous before a concert. They were jitters soon to be forgotten, because he usually played his best at the concert and played significantly worse at any other time.

The stage lights always burned him in his black suit, but he, like everyone else in the entire orchestra, bore it. The director always tried to make sure that it wasn’t too bothersome while still allowing the audience to actually be able to see the orchestra. Not that it mattered, since no one other than parents actually attended.

Jem smiled. Parents and one best friend.

Will was sitting in the front row, lounging like a cat that had made its home on the armchair. He met Will’s eyes with some lingering anxiety, and felt it melt away at Will’s slight upturn of his mouth. He gripped his violin and bow tighter for a moment before relaxing it a bit.

The director tapped his baton on the music stand to get the orchestra’s attention. He signaled the tempo in small gestures so the audience wouldn’t see, then raised his arms. The violins and violas lifted their instruments as one while the cello and bass got into their own playing positions.

The concert began.

Their warm-up piece was Hornpipe from Water Music by Handel. It was a familiar piece; most of the pieces that they played were at least somewhat famous. If not, they were certainly fun to play.

The feeling of the bow in his hand and his fingers flying over the strings was natural. The bow was an extension of his right arm, and the violin a part of his left. Of course, this did not mean his playing was impeccable. He stumbled once or twice during the piece the same way he tripped over his own foot or a sudden step up on the sidewalk while walking. But Jem did not know a single person who didn’t make a mistake during concerts.

All of his pieces felt so short when he played them; even the longer ones. It was always a surprise to have to go back to playing position for a moment while the audience cheered. It was like waking up from a dream. He glanced at Will, who was clapping loudly.

He gave his friend a short nod before lifting his instrument to play the last piece.

The ending of the concert was a huge blur, the routine of having to take the stands and chairs away from the stage while carrying your instrument as well. Jem balanced it well enough, his violin and bow in one hand, and dragging his chair with the other. He held thin binder in which he kept his pieces between his arm and his torso, making it uncomfortable but an efficient way to carry (mostly) everything. He would come back for the stand later, if his stand partner didn’t get it before him.

He took the chair to the orchestra room where another student stacked it on top of another. He put his violin and bow into his violin case. He saw his stand partner carry in the music stand, so all he needed to do was meet his parents. They’d have a celebratory dinner and go home. He wondered if he should ask if Will could come along. He hadn’t ever asked it before.

His parents were standing by the door to leave. Will was there, too, standing a couple steps away. They shared a smile and Will congratulated him. His mother came up to him and Jem gave her a one-armed hug, on account of his holding his violin.

“Who’s up for pizza?” asked his father.

“I am _always_ up for pizza,” answered Jem, grinning. “Can Will come, too?”

Will started, as if he wasn’t expecting to be invited along. “Well, I…”

“Of course he can come,” said his mother. “Would you like to join us, William?”

He shrugged. “Sure.”

Jem bumped his friend’s shoulder. “You should text Charlotte to tell her you’ll be staying over. You don’t want to worry her.”

“She knows I’m here. She’ll just assume that I stayed with you,” Will replied. “It’s not necessary.”

Jem knew not to discuss it further. If he pressed, Will would most definitely not text Charlotte. As it stood right now, chances of Will telling Charlotte that he would stay over were about 70/30.

The four of them made way to the car. Will and Jem sat together in the back. Will said nothing, and Jem pretended not to see him pull out his cell phone and send a text –probably to Charlotte. Jem shook his head but smiled. A second later, Will’s phone buzzed. Will unlocked his phone to read it, then set it down on his thigh and looked out the window until they arrived at the pizzeria.

Dinner went by quickly. Will and Jem were two fourteen-year-old boys who hadn’t eaten in the past six hours. They inhaled five pieces of pizza each. They might have been able to eat more, but his parents had only ordered two pizzas, and they had to eat too.

Back at Jem’s house, Will spread out his –or, well, it was technically Jem’s but had become his –sleeping bag.

“You’re lucky you spend the night so much,” said Jem, throwing a pair of Will’s pajamas that he’d forgotten two weeks before at him. “Or we’d have had to stop by your house to get you clothes.”

“I could always just borrow some of yours,” Will said, allowing himself to smile. “We’re the same size.”

“For now,” Jem teased.

Will threw a pillow at him. Jem threw it back, smacking Will square in the face. Will’s face scrunched up with playful, mock anger and he stood up and lunged at Jem, toppling him over. They both fell on the floor, laughing.

They played video games and watched movies until Jem’s mother knocked on his bedroom door to tell them to go to sleep. Jem called out an apology and shut off the television and turned off the lights, stumbling to bed in the dark.

“You’re not really going to sleep, are you?” Will asked, though his voice was soft so as to not alert Jem’s mother.

Jem let out a short exhale that could be taken as a laugh. “Not unless you are.”

Jem could imagine Will’s smile. “Good.”

“So what do you want to talk about, then?” Jem whispered.

“Are you really going back to Shanghai?”

Jem was surprised. Will sounded worried. He remembered that he was just about William’s only friend. “Just for a month over summer. We’re visiting family. We can talk over email.”

“I guess,” said Will.

“You’ll have Jessamine,” Jem tried. “And Charlotte and Henry.”

Will sighed. “Jessamine and I don’t get along.”

“You don’t get along with anyone,” Jem said, and though he meant for it to come out light and teasing, the words were heavy with truth.

Will was silent for so long that Jem thought he might have given up on the conversation and gone to sleep. “I don’t mean to be this way.”

“I know,” Jem said finally.

~.~.~

Will kicked a rock away from his foot. The day was blazing hot, but he’d refused Charlotte’s offers of going to the pool in favor of wandering around the neighborhood with his hands in his pockets and sun burning on his shoulders. Summer was so dull without Jem around. He was glad that his friend was having a good time with family, but they hadn’t talked in two days because of time differences and Jem’s busy schedule in Shanghai.

He stopped for a moment in front of an apartment building and sighed. He should have gone to the pool.

Someone tapped his shoulder and he started. He looked up to see a guy about fifteen or sixteen grinning at him. “Hey, babe, I didn’t know you’d be coming around today!”

Will stumbled back a step, confused.

“Just go with it,” the guy added in a hushed voice. “I’m Magnus. That girl over there’s my ex, please help me out here.”

Will glanced over to see a girl about the same age as Magnus. She was wearing heels and her long, straight black hair fell down her back. Will briefly thought that they made a cute couple if only they were actually going out and not, you know, currently exes.

“I wanted to surprise you,” said Will, flustered. He tried to seem flirty but it probably failed miserably.

“As you can see, Camille,” Magnus said, turning back to the girl and snaking his arm around Will’s waist. “I’m taken. And you’re a major bitch. I’d say something about how we’re never getting back together but Taylor Swift already sang that tune.”

Camille scrunched her nose and gave Will a once-over. She spun around on her heel and went back into her car. She drove off.

Magnus let out a breath and let go of Will. “I’m sorry about that.”

Will shook his head and laughed. “No worries. I’m Will.” He and Magnus shook hands. After they dropped their hands at their sides, Will attempted to restart the conversation. “So Camille is a major bitch, huh?”

“She cheated on me,” said Magnus, clenching his fists. “Thinks that just because her soulmate died she can screw around however she likes.”

“So… you two…” said Will. “She’s not your…”

Magnus looked at him with steady amber eyes. “You don’t have to be in a relationship with your soulmate. I haven’t met mine yet. I can be in a relationship without him or her.”

“I’ve met my soulmate,” said Will.

Magnus tensed. “Were you on your way to meet them? Shit, I –”

“We aren’t together,” Will said, and he felt a lump at his throat when his mind supplied, _yet_. He didn’t want there to be a _yet_. He wasn’t in love with Jem and the very thought terrified him. “But he is out of the country and I’m really bored without him.”

Magnus gave a laugh. “Well, you can come over into my apartment if you want. Anytime.” He waved to the apartment building behind him.

“I’ll probably take you up on that offer,” said Will.

.

Will didn’t really think that he would go to Magnus’ apartment so soon, but there he was the very next day, buzzing up the doorbell like this was Jem’s house.  

“Who is it?”

“It’s Will Herondale?” it came out as a question. “We met yesterday. You pretended I was your boyfriend.”

“Oh, right, of course. Come on up,” said Magnus.

Will climbed up the stairs and knocked on the door, trying not to seem winded.

Magnus opened the door. He was holding a cat in his arms, a fat and fluffy thing, with wide glowing eyes.

“William,” Magnus mused, as though he had expected him, but not quite so soon. Will wondered himself what he was doing there. He could hear Avril Lavigne’s “I Can Do Better _”_ blasting through the loft, but Magnus didn’t seem embarrassed at all to be listening to angry girl music.

“I made a breakup playlist,” said Magnus. “The one before this one was ‘Thanks for the Memories’ by Fall Out Boy.”

“I like that one,” said Will. “Did you make this playlist yesterday?”

“I may have gotten the idea to do so after my argument with Camille. It’s a good playlist,” Magnus said, not without pride.

“I’m sure it is,” Will replied. “So what do you do, besides make breakup playlists for your cheating ex-girlfriend?”

“Well, today is bath day for The Great Catsby here. You’ve come right on time to see me get murdered by his claws,” Magnus said, scratching the cat’s ears.

“Your cat’s name is The Great Catsby?” Will asked, amused.

“Catsby for short,” Magnus said. “Come in. Maybe you can help me with him.”

Will was caught in between saying that maybe he could come back another time and feeling tempted at the thought of seeing Magnus Bane wrestle with his cat. It was honestly no contest. “Sure.”

The Great Catsby did not like getting baths and though Will was standing at least five feet away, he somehow managed to get soaked from head to toe. Magnus was much worse off, sporting a cut on his chin and several other scratches on his arms. But at least Catsby was clean.

The cat paced around the bathroom meowing, his tail swishing in the way they did when cats were angry.

Magnus was sitting on the floor, his head resting on the wall. “God.”

“You really did get murdered,” Will observed.

“Better this way than others,” said Magnus, reaching out to pet Catsby. His fur was still damp but would dry soon enough. “I refuse to die of a broken heart.”

“You and me both,” Will agreed.

The older teen looked at him curiously. “Is that why you and your soulmate aren’t together?”

Will was thrown for a loop. He shook his head to clear it. “No, not at all.”

“Then what’s the problem? If I had been lucky enough to meet my soulmate at fourteen –”

“We met at twelve,” said Will, squaring his jaw.

Magnus raised his eyebrows. “That does make things more complicated. So, what, you’re… friends, I’m assuming?”

“We’re friends,” he agreed. Best friends, he wanted to add, but he wondered if Jem felt that way about him. Will didn’t talk about anything much deeper than this week’s book. At least, he tried not to. Will tried to divert the conversation away from him and Jem. He didn’t want talk about soulmates. Not as long as it concerned he and Jem. “And what about you?”

“What about me?” Magnus asked, looking amused. “I haven’t met my soulmate yet, I told you that.”

“Do you want to?” Will ventured.

“Of course I do. But when it happens, it happens. I can’t say I’m not jealous of you, though,” said Magnus.

“It shouldn’t have happened that way,” Will said. The Great Catsby padded up to him and started rubbing his face on Will’s knee. He reached out and stroked Catsby’s head. “It should have been longer before I met Jem.”

“You’re probably the only one I will ever know to say that,” Magnus said. “Why is that?”

Will tensed. He had not told anyone the story. Even Charlotte only knew a few details. He ran away from home and was placed in foster care, that’s all Charlotte and Henry knew. Charlotte didn’t know the reason he’d run away from home was because his sister died and Will was convinced it was his fault. Charlotte didn’t know that he couldn’t stand to wake up in his home to a life without Ella and know that it was his fault she wasn’t there anymore.

And Jem, well, Jem didn’t know anything at all. He probably assumed that Will was in foster care simply because his parents had died. In a way, they had. Will had never seen them again; they might as well have been dead.  Will hadn’t told Jem a single thing. He didn’t want to open old wounds.

But here, with Magnus, Will spilled everything out like an opened paint can that had toppled over. Jem was so careful with not pushing and Will didn’t talk, but Magnus was so casual and… easy. He had known Magnus for two days and he was just easy, a breath of fresh air. There was no extra weight.

“If Ella hadn’t died, I wouldn’t have run away,” Will finished. “I would still be with my family.”

Magnus was quiet for a moment. “But you wouldn’t know Jem.”

“Of course I would,” Will said. “I’d just meet him a few years down the road.”

 “You don’t truly know that. The way things happened to you, William, they led you to meet Jem. It’s painful, I know, but good did come from it. My parents–” Magnus hesitated, as though unsure of whether or not to share. It seemed that both of them had reservations with sharing things from their past. “My parents were not the greatest people on the planet. I got emancipated. I’m sixteen, but I’m doing well on my own. Surely good things did happen to you since you ran away?”

Will did not mention how Jem’s family always tried to make him feel welcome in their home. He didn’t mention the way he sometimes caught Charlotte looking at him with a strange expression mixed with affection and curiosity. How he had walked into a second and even a third family while trying to escape his first.

It had helped him in many ways, but he still missed his real parents. His sisters.

Yet right now, the person he missed most was Jem.

“I’m going to go,” said Will, standing up.

Magnus blinked and walked him out the door. “I hope you’re only leaving to think about what I’ve told you. I’m counting you as a friend now, Will Herondale. Don’t make this the last time I see you.”

~.~.~

Jem took four days after coming back home from Shanghai to rest and fix his sleep schedule. He didn’t see Will at all, but he did get a few texts from him. There were two weeks left until school started up again, and Will seemed desperate to spend some time with Jem before they had to go back.

Jem opened the door to his house before Will could knock.

Will grinned. “How did you know I was here?”

“I have a sense that tells me when you’re going to show up unannounced,” said Jem, moving aside so that his friend could enter his house.

“I haven’t seen you in a month,” said Will. “And you’ve been back for four days. That’s enough time away from me, isn’t it?”

“Too much time,” Jem agreed.

Will bumped him with his shoulder playfully.

.

Will had only cried that one time when he stayed over. Jem still wasn’t sure why. But that night was the second time Jem woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of Will’s sniffles. Jem heard Will’s voice faintly say “Cecily” and his heart nearly stopped.

Jem turned on the light on his nightstand. He tried again, the way he had over a year ago. “Is something wrong, Will?”

Will looked at Jem. His gaze was cautious, guarded. Jem was used to this expression. He didn’t really expect anything at all, just Will brushing him off as usual. But tonight, he met Jem’s eyes and wiped his cheeks. “I miss my family sometimes.”

Jem didn’t say anything, didn’t know if he should venture into it further. He didn’t know how to comfort Will. He had not lost his family, in whatever way Will did. Jem was fairly sure that Will wasn’t about to clarify anything (he never did, when it came to things like this), but today was apparently an anomaly.

“Sometimes I wish I hadn’t run away,” said Will.

Jem was still silent. He didn’t display any sort of surprise at Will’s words. He felt that if he said anything, Will would retreat back into his little wall and close the door. Will ran away from his home, that’s how he ended up in foster care, then.

“I wish I could have them _and_ you.”

Jem couldn’t stay quiet at that. “Why not? Why can’t you go back to them, if you miss them so much?”

Will started, as if he hadn’t expected his friend to speak. “I have a life here now. I’ve lived here for two years. And there’s all this legal stuff. I’d rather… I’d rather just stay.”

“You don’t even want to visit them?”

Will’s face shuttered. “I can’t.” He rolled over and curled up, as if he’d gone asleep instantly. As if the conversation had never happened.

Jem didn’t know how to feel about all of this. On the one hand, Will had finally decided to open up with him. Jem got something, even if it was just a small glimpse, of his past. On the other, Will was unlikely to take any sort of advice from Jem. He sighed and turned off his light again.

~.~.~

Charlotte opened the door to Will’s room and shook her head. He looked up from the clothes that he was quickly stuffing into his backpack. Neither of them said a word for a moment, but Will couldn’t help but think about how familiar Charlotte’s stance looked to him. Her hand was still gripping the door handle, her head was cocked to the side, her lips were quirked up slightly. She looked just like his mother that way. Will wondered if that was just a “mother thing;” if all mothers had the same look.

“You spend more time at Jem’s than you do here,” she said, though there was no bite to her comment. It was… affectionate.

“He’s my best friend,” Will said.

“Not even I spent that much time at my best friend’s house,” said Charlotte. It was gentle teasing, and Will only shrugged. Charlotte’s smile faded. “All right, well, hurry up so I can drive you.”

Will finished packing his bag and wore his bag with one strap because he was in a rush to get downstairs. As he walked, he twisted his left arm, trying to get his arm through the second backpack strap. It was uncomfortable for a moment before he finally got it.

Jessamine was watching television in the living room. She glanced up at him and rolled her eyes as he passed her. “Going to see Jem?”

“Yes,” he answered shortly.

“I guess I should be glad you’re with him so often. I don’t have to deal with you,” she said, then turned back to her program.

“Jessamine,” Charlotte scolded lightly. Jessamine and Will’s relationship primarily consisted of the two making biting remarks at one another, so he wasn’t bothered.

“I feel much the same way,” Will told Jessamine.

She rolled her eyes again and picked up the remote control to change the channel.

“Do you want to come along, Jessie?” Charlotte asked.

Jessamine made a noise that sounded like a groan, which meant she very much did not want to come along. Good. Will didn’t want her to come. Let her watch Project Runway and leave him and Jem alone.

“We could go to the mall after dropping off Will,” Charlotte tempted.

Jessamine shut off the television and stretched. “Fine. But I call shotgun.”

Will hated it when Jessamine called shotgun because she took complete and total control of the radio. He was like that too, but at least his taste in music was marginally better than Jessamine’s love of Maroon 5 –oh, come on, he couldn’t pretend that he didn’t like at least _a few_ Maroon 5 songs. The only reason Will trashed Jessamine’s music tastes was because it was _Jessamine’s_ music taste, no matter how often they aligned.

Jessamine also liked to sing along to the radio –who didn’t? The problem was that her singing resembled a seagull’s screeching. But if Will sang along to Nicki Minaj’s “Super Bass” _with_ Jessamine, no one had to know.

“So you like rap music now?” Jessamine asked.

“It’s Nicki Minaj,” said Will simply.

Charlotte parked the car outside of Jem’s home. “What time do you want me to pick you up tomorrow, Will?”

“I’ll text you,” he said, getting out of the car. “See you!”

He closed the car door and walked up to the front door of Jem’s house. He pressed the doorbell and Jem answered the door in three seconds.

“Ready?” Jem asked.

“For dinner? Sure am,” he said, brushing past Jem.

Jem closed the door behind him. “It won’t be ready for half an hour. We can play video games while we wait.”

“That’s fine,” said Will.

They walked to the living room. Jem’s violin case was open on the floor, while his violin was set carefully on the couch. The bow was next to the violin.

“Did I interrupt your practicing?” Will asked, looking at the instrument.

“I was about to finish up,” Jem said, giving him a smile. It was clearly a lie. There wasn’t enough rosin on the violin’s strings.

“No, please, practice all you want,” Will told him. He started to unzip his backpack. He’d brought a copy of one of his favorite books, anyway.

“If you’re sure,” said Jem, reaching for his violin and bow.

Will waved at him to start and flipped open his book to where he’d left off. Jem warmed up with his scales and went on to practice a few of his pieces –no doubt something for his next orchestra concert. It was a lovely backdrop.

They were called to dinner exactly when Jem said it would be ready. Will had been teasing Jem for his stomach rumbling and tried to ignore his own stomach’s cries for food. Will took his usual seat next to Jem and waited to be served while Jem asked his mother if there was anything she wanted him to help her with.

.

This wasn’t the first time he’d played laser tag. Charlotte and Henry had taken him and Jessamine once, and Will had taken pleasure in shooting her as often as possible. Jessamine had sternly told him that they were supposed to be on the same team. Will had told her that it was every man for himself, and shot her again.

This time was different, though. When the employee instructed that teams were not allowed, Will glanced at Jem and grinned. Will had never been one to stick completely to the rules, and this was a useless and petty rule that was broken more times than could be counted.

No teams were allowed, but all the kids broke up into teams as soon as they were let into the maze anyway. The room was illuminated only with the soft purple of black light. Jem had made sure to tell Will only to wear dark clothes so that they wouldn’t be easily spotted. Still, their vests blinked with green lights, so others could still see them.

Will ran through the maze, shooting anyone in sight as long as they weren’t Jem.

“Maybe we should just stay in one spot,” said Jem. “We might run into an ambush this way. We should set up an ambush instead.”

“There’s an idea,” Will mused. He looked around. “That bridge, let’s go up there and shoot the people below.”

He assumed Jem nodded, because when Will started fast-walking to the bridge, Jem was following. They climbed up some stairs and were met with an ambush themselves. Will shot each of them, but was disabled for thirty seconds because he’d been shot so much. The ambushers ran past them down the stairs to hunt on some other poor innocent souls.

“At least we’re basically invisible for now,” said Jem as they kept walking in a quick pace.

Will saw blinking green lights and stopped dead holding out a hand for Jem to stay behind him. He peeked around the turn they were about to take and saw two girls on the bridge that he’d wanted to take in order to ambush people. He looked behind him and grinned at Jem.

He ran out and shot them in a rush, again and again until they’d gone black for thirty seconds. They ran away, and he shot them again once their green lights came back on.

“ _Stop it!”_ said one of the girls as they backed away, shooting him on the shoulder for good measure.

“Jem!” he said, turning. “Did you see that? Wasn’t that awesome?”

It was always fun to brag to Jem. He did it often when they played video games and it was no different here.

“Bravo, you shot them dead twice.” Jem’s white teeth glowed in the black light. He was smiling.

They ambushed a few others and were ambushed a few more times before the game was over.

Will and Jem peeled off their vests.

“Do you want to see our statistics?” Will asked.

“Of course,” Jem said.

They walked up to the counter and checked. Will’s nickname was at the top of the list. He pumped his fist in the air. “Number one! I’m number one, do you see Jem?”

He grinned and nodded. He pointed to his own nickname on the scoreboard.

Jem was in third place.

“That’s my Jem!” Will hollered, throwing his arm around his friend.

Jem threw his head back and laughed. “I’m upset. I’ve gotten first place before, more times than I could count.”

“Let’s play again,” said Will. “You could make first this time, I know it.”

“You’d take second place for me?” asked Jem, his eyes gleaming. “The great William Herondale?”

“Of course!” Will said. It was left at only that, but a thought came unbidden to him. _I’d do anything for you, Jem._ Will had always known that, as some sort of bone-deep instinct. But now it was there, in words, in the forefront of his mind. He took a breath, forcing a smile. If Jem noticed the sudden tension, he didn’t comment on it.

They had only been _teasing_ each other. Light bickering the way that they always did.

“Do you have extra money?” Jem asked, pulling out his wallet to slap fifteen dollars on the counter.

Will took out his own wallet and laid down a twenty. The cashier gave him back a five dollar bill.

“Let’s do this!”

.

Jem got first.

Will got second.

And they were possibly two of the best players that laser tag place had seen in a long time.

~.~.~

Jem flipped through the CDs at the bookstore while Will looked over his shoulder. Will was holding the book he’d chosen to buy close to his chest he kept reading the albums that Jem showed him and disapproving.

“We don’t have the exact same taste in music, Will,” Jem said, glancing back at his friend. He held up Fun.’s album _Aim and Ignite_.

Will shrugged. “It’s pretty good, I guess.”

“You _guess_?” Jem asked, grinning.  “I _guess_ I should decide what music _I_ spend _my_ money on.”

Will threw his head up and laughed. “All right, all right! I don’t know why you buy CDs anyway. You have an iPod.”

“I like having a hardcopy sometimes,” Jem said.

“There is nothing wrong with that,” said a new voice, starling both the boys.

Jem didn’t recognize the person when he turned to see him. He was tall and looked to be about two years older than them. He wore black eyeliner, which might’ve been dramatic, but it made his eyes stand out well.

“Magnus!” said Will, breaking into a smile. He turned to address Jem now. “You remember I told you about him? This is Magnus Bane.”

“We finally meet,” Jem said, holding out his hand. Magnus took it and shook it.

“So this is the famous James Carstairs,” Magnus mused, giving Jem a once-over.

“Will talks about me a lot?”

Magnus gazed at him with some amusement. “Dear, you’re _all_ he ever talks about. Jem this, Jem that. _‘Oh, Jem was playing Hungarian Dance Number Five by Handel the other day.’_ ”

Will was looking a little flushed, but he snapped out of it only to correct him. “Hungarian Dance Number Five is by Brahms.”

Jem had never been so proud of Will.

Magnus raised his eyebrows, feigning surprise. “Of course. Well, it’s been lovely to meet you, Jem, but I’ve got to go now. See you later, Will.”

Will said a goodbye as Magnus turned and left to pay for his own books. Jem watched him go without saying a word. As soon as Magnus had gone out of sight, he turned to Will. “So, he was the one who made you tell me?”

Will scowled. It was obvious that he had understood what Jem meant. “He didn’t tell me to do anything. I just figured it was time.”

“I can’t believe you told him before me,” said Jem, feeling a rare spark of jealousy. “And you’d just met him.”

“I know. I’m sorry,” said Will. “And I _do_ trust you, Jem. I trust you more than anyone. You know that. You have to know that.”

Jem paused for a moment. He sighed. “Yeah, I know that.”

~.~.~

With how often they spent time together, which was every day and as much as they could, the subject of soulmates never came up. It was as though they’d both forgotten, or at least put it out of their minds. That was, until Will began to notice the way some girls looked at Jem. It made sense. Jem was handsome, and the kindest soul Will had ever known to boot.  

Jem received the female attention with some shyness. Will knew that he would want to be certain that they _wanted_ to explore relationships before meeting their soulmate. No one knew when it would happen, after all. Back during Will’s parents’ youth, it had not been so common to be in a relationship with someone if they were not your soulmate. Now, people had begun to realize that a soulmate was not the be-all-end-all of a relationship. Sometimes things didn’t work out, even if you were soulmates. Sometimes things were amazing with a person who you weren’t meant to be with.

Will enjoyed Jem’s friendship, but felt anxiety gnaw at his stomach at the thought of being in a romantic relationship with him. He knew that they were soulmates, and he wasn’t stupid. He knew that he liked Jem. But he was afraid.

He decided to go the other route for a while. He was handsome and charming, too, after all. Girls and boys both turned their heads to look at him when he entered a room. So he winked at them, and flirted, and kissed them. He ran his hands through soft hair. It was nice, but they weren’t Jem. They weren’t Jem, and that made them safe.

“Do you have a crush?” Will asked Jem one night they were having a sleepover. He picked at the carpet and glanced up at his friend. That day at school, a pretty girl by the name of Sophie had been flirting with Jem.

His best friend shrugged, a ghost of a smile on his lips. “I might.”

Will felt his stomach turn. He was filled with warmth and affection for Jem, which inexplicably dried up once he remembered Sophie. It was replaced with a twinge of jealousy. It was _ridiculous_ because Will had been fooling around for months.

He swallowed it down. “Talk to me, then.”

Jem laughed. “Oh, I don’t know, Will.”

“Don’t be old-fashioned, Jem,” said Will. “This isn’t your first crush.”

“Will,” said Jem, and his tone was sharp. It wasn’t like him at all. Will knew then not to joke around. “It is. It is my first crush.”

It would be his only warning, Will knew. If he pushed further, he would learn things he already knew. Things he preferred not to think about for the time being. And yet he wanted to. It was the strangest thing. He very much wanted to push Jem.

He didn’t.

~.~.~

Jem knew that it wasn’t fair of him to be jealous. After all, he had told Will all those years ago that they didn’t have to be soulmates, and could just be friends. They had met at twelve, after all. They’d been too young to start up a relationship then. Now they were sixteen, but nothing in their relationship had changed. Will was his best friend, more than his best friend, really; but the kisses and soft touches that Jem wanted them to share were absent.

Instead Jem got to see Will flirting with girls and boys alike. He shouldn’t have been jealous. Just because he and Will were soulmates didn’t mean he had any sort of claim to Will’s heart. But he was jealous, and he was so unbelievably in love with Will.

And so he tried to do what Will was doing. Sophie Collins had a crush on him, and he tried to find some experience, some common ground so that they could date –however briefly, before he and Will found each other again. Because, Jem thought stubbornly, they _would_ find each other.

But it didn’t work out. Sophie was a sweet girl, but Jem could not even bring himself to kiss her.

Perhaps he was just old-fashioned that way.

“It’s all right,” said Sophie, trying to save face. She looked as though she were keeping herself from crying. “I… want to wait till I meet my soulmate, too.”

“I am so sorry, Sophie,” he murmured.

Sophie gave him a wavering smile. She stood up and bade him a quick goodbye.

Will texted Jem later that night.

_> How’d your date with Sophie go?_

_> >It didn’t._

_> >>Wait, what happened? She stood you up?_

Jem could almost see Will’s blue eyes burning with rage. It almost made him laugh, thinking about how protective over Jem he was, if he weren’t so tired.

_> No nothing like that_

_> >Want me to come over?_

_> >> No it’s fine. See you tomorrow?_

_> >>> Sure._

Jem collapsed on his bed and sighed. He couldn’t help looking forward to Will coming over tomorrow. He didn’t know if it was a soulmate thing or just the fact that Will was his best friend. He wondered if it could be both, or if it even mattered.

He didn’t know when he fell asleep, but he was woken up by his mother knocking on his bedroom door telling him to wake up because Will was outside.

Jem mouthed a curse word and kicked away his sheets. He got dressed and brushed his teeth quickly, rushing downstairs. Will was standing in the foyer, hands in his pockets, wearing his usual smirk on his face.

“Overslept today, didn’t we, James?”

“Shut up,” he muttered.

Will laughed. Jem couldn’t help but smile in return. Will only ever laughed with him. He didn’t even have to try. It was as if everything Jem could do or say was so incredibly endearing or amusing that Will couldn’t help expressing his joy.

Jem told Will to wait for him while he got a granola bar from the kitchen, since he couldn’t very well leave the house without eating anything. He hurried back to his friend and they both left the house, Jem calling out a quick goodbye to his parents.

Will fumbled with his car keys. “Where do you want to go?”

Jem shrugged, saying he’d prefer to take a walk than to drive somewhere. Will stuck his keys back in his pocket.

They walked around Jem’s neighborhood for a while in silence, passing trees shedding their leaves. The sun was warm on his face but the air had the perfect amount of chill.

“You didn’t really say anything about your date,” said Will finally, as he sat on a bench by the side of the road.

Jem sat beside him. “There wasn’t much to tell.”

“So… nothing happened?” Will asked. He sounded hopeful, which irritated Jem beyond belief.

“I took her to dinner, but we didn’t… click. Sophie’s a sweet girl, but nothing happened.”

Will shifted his position a bit, to get more comfortable. As comfortable as one could be on a wooden bench. “So… you didn’t kiss her, then?”

Jem sighed. “No, Will. I have never kissed _anyone_.”

“Oh.” Will was quiet for a moment. “I have.”

“I know.” Jem’s reply might have been a bit curter than he’d meant it to be.

Will tensed. “Are you angry?”

Jem wanted to say no and leave the conversation alone. He wanted to say yes so that they could finally confront the elephant in the room. The truth was more complicated than that. Jem wasn’t angry with Will, or at least he knew that he shouldn’t be. They were sixteen years old, so who was Jem to keep his friend from experimenting with sexuality? And besides, they had never acknowledged the fact that they were soulmates to each other apart from when they first met. Jem wondered if Will even thought about it, talked about it to other people. He wondered if Will even remembered. Jem had absolutely _no right_ to be angry.

 “A little,” he said, because it was as close to the truth as he could possibly get to. He wondered if Will would be confused as to why he was angry, or if Will was as aware of the situation as Jem was.

Will looked a little pale. It wasn’t like him at all. He looked away from Jem, grabbing onto the edge of the seat. “Why? Did I do something? Did…” he trailed off, turning his head to look at Jem again. His blue eyes were a storm of confusion and anxiety. “Jem, if…”

“I’m angry because I want to kiss you and you look at me like we’re not soulmates,” said Jem in a rush. He wasn’t used to this sort of role-reversal. It was Will who was usually direct and spontaneous, but then it was also Will who ran away from his problems.

Will made a little strangled sound from the back of his throat. He was no longer pale. Instead, his cheeks were starting to flush. “Oh.”

Jem didn’t say anything else. There it was, out in the open. He didn’t _have_ to say anything else.

“I’m sorry,” Will said after a pause that could have been two seconds or two years.

He sighed. “It’s fine, Will.”

“No,” he said, dark eyebrows furrowed. He was leaning in now. “No, I’m _sorry_. I just –I don’t know. I was scared.”

“Are you scared now?” Jem was. Well, he wasn’t scared, but he was more nervous than anything else. He felt that he might start shaking soon. His stomach was already turning.

Will gave a quick shake of his head.

“Will?” he asked, leaning in just a miniscule amount closer.

“Yes?” he breathed.

“Can I kiss you?” Jem said.

He didn’t even hear his own words, they were so low, but Will let out a short breath that might have been a laugh. Will closed his eyes and gave a short nod, leaning in closer.

“Yes.” Will’s voice was quiet, but he was so _close_ Jem could feel Will’s words brush against his face.

Jem felt a lump at his throat. He swallowed it down, that lump of fear, reminding himself –Will had said yes.

Will had said yes, so Jem curled his hand around the back of Will’s neck and met him halfway. Will started back for a moment, surprised even though he’d known it was coming. Jem almost retracted his hand, terrified he was doing something wrong, or that Will had changed his mind. But Will went back into the kiss again with a sigh. He reached out to hold Jem’s waist.

After a few moments, Jem pulled away slightly. He still let his forehead rest on Will’s, but his hand slid to cup Will’s cheek. His heart raced, pumping blood through him. He felt like laughing and crying at the same time. He had kissed Will Herondale. He had kissed Will Herondale, his best friend, his soulmate, and everything felt perfect. Everything felt _right_.

Will took a couple of seconds before he opened his eyes. He swallowed before saying shakily, “Jem.”

Jem dropped his hand from Will’s face and inched away from his friend so that they weren’t touching at all anymore. He opened his mouth to apologize, but Will shook his head.

“Don’t. That was…” Will seemed lost for words, which was something that absolutely never happened. Not to Will. He furrowed his eyebrows and licked his lips in thought. “I felt like… I felt like I could see colors that don’t exist. I’m the one who’s sorry, Jem. I kept this from both of us. I was frightened.”

He laughed. He was laughing and shaking, Jem was so relieved and… _elated_.

“It’s silly,” Will said. He grinned sheepishly.

Jem’s own smile melted, though he could still feel the amusement humming inside. He tried to make his voice serious so that Will would know it was the truth. But there was a certain lightness to his tone that Jem wouldn’t be able to be rid of for a while. “It’s not silly. I was scared, too.”

“Really?” Will asked. “Why?”

“Well, you’re…” Jem trailed off, but gestured to Will as if it explained things. He was _William Herondale._ He flashed his grin and girls would swoon. He was never that person to Jem, but Jem had been frightened nonetheless, if that’s what Will truly thought love was.

Will seemed to understand, though he looked upset at the implication. “I would _never_ want to hurt you, Jem. I am truly sorry if you thought love was a game to me.”

“It’s not, then?”

Will appeared hurt. His shoulders slumped. “No. No, I thought… I don’t know. I just… I knew that being soulmates wasn’t a guarantee.  And I was scared that I would do or say something to hurt you, and that I would lose you. And that can’t happen, Jem. _I can’t lose you._ ”

Jem recalled the time Will had finally first told him about his family, and how he’d run away. About how he wished that he could have both Jem and his family, but he couldn’t. Will only had Jem now. He could understand how Will didn’t want to lose his family _and_ Jem.

Jem took Will’s hand and held it firmly. He huffed with amusement. “Will, what could you _possibly_ do or say that would make you lose me?”

Will shook his head and shrugged. He was grinning again suddenly. Jem was overcome with the want to kiss him again. So he did. This one was shorter, even though Will had returned the kiss with equal fervor. Will pulled away first, dark blue eyes more intense than Jem had ever seen them.  

“Jem,” Will said, squeezing Jem’s hand with his own. “Will you go on a date with me?”

Jem flashed him a disbelieving look. “Of course.”

~.~.~

Will found himself at a loss for words when they did go on their date. It wasn’t anything special, really. A dinner at a restaurant that wasn’t too expensive. And it wasn’t that Will was nervous. He just found himself without anything to say.

He had been on dates before, of course. He’d just never been on a date with someone who already knew everything about him. Maybe dinner was a bad idea. Maybe they should have gone to a movie instead –at least that way they would have had something to discuss afterwards.

When Will confessed this to Jem, he laughed.

He reached across the table and put his hand over Will’s. Their eyes met, and Will could see amusement and affection glimmering in them. “No, this is perfect. Besides, you don’t have to tell me your life story. Just… talk to me about the book you’re reading, or the bands you’re listening to, or about how hard that Pre-Calculus test was. Like we always do. Things don’t have to be that different.”

Will huffed out a short laugh. “Why are you always right?”

The corners of Jem’s mouth quirked upward.  “Not always. I failed my Geometry midterm last year.”

“Everyone failed it. You’re not special,” said Will.

Jem laughed. Will grinned, pleased with himself.

Their date was full of playful bickering, and Will wouldn’t have had it any other way.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you follow me on Tumblr, you probably may have seen me complaining about writing this. If you happen to be my friend Goldie, you definitely know how much I've been complaining about this fucking fluff fic. 
> 
> I've kept my promise and there is lots of Tessa in this chapter. And an odd amount of Jessamine, but not as much Magnus as I'd have liked. 
> 
> I'm constantly worried about the IC-ness of the characters but at this point, 18K into a fluff fic, I barely care (I do care but I don't want to rewrite the entire thing, you see). I just want to be finished. When will I be finished. This fic is so ridiculously long for a fluff fic. Free me. Please.

Charlotte took the exit off of the highway that would bring them to Will’s old home. Will was leaning on Jem’s shoulder, fast asleep. Jem marveled at the thought. If it were him finally meeting his parents and younger sister again after six years, he wouldn’t have been able to sleep during the car ride. He’d probably be leaning forward with anticipation.

It had taken a long, long time for Jem to convince Will to do this. Three and a half years. But a couple months before they’d graduated from high school, Will had come up to Jem and told him that he’d asked Charlotte and Henry if they could go visit his parents after graduation. He’d then promptly invited Jem along, to which Jem had responded that of course he would. 

Jem shook Will awake gently.

“Hmm?” said Will, looking like he was almost struggling to wake up. He sat up straight and rubbed his eyes. “Almost there?”

“That’s right,” said Charlotte, glancing back at them through the rearview mirror.

Will turned to Jem and gave him a sweet smile. “Thank you for coming with me.”

Jem took Will’s hand in his own and gave it a squeeze. “Of course.”

Charlotte parked the car on the street outside of a huge suburban house, where a girl was outside playing Frisbee with her dog in the yellow grass of their front yard. Will was staring at her through the window.

“Is that Cecily?” asked Jem.

Will licked his lips and addressed Charlotte. “They moved.”

Charlotte froze. “What?”

Now he looked to Jem. “My parents and my sister. They moved. That’s not Cecily.” Will slumped against the seat. “God, I’m an idiot.”

“You’re not,” said Jem, holding Will’s shoulder. “You’re not. We’ll find them, all right? We can check Cecily’s Facebook or something.”

Will didn’t look convinced, but he turned to Charlotte. “I’m sorry for making you drive all the way out here.”

Charlotte sighed, but turned around to face them with a gentle smile. “It’s okay, Will. Let’s just go find somewhere to eat and go back home, all right?”

~.~.~

Will and Jem didn’t go back to trying to find Will’s parents. It was a busy summer, filled with college orientations and getting an apartment lease together and working. Working, working, working.  Charlotte, Henry, and Jem’s parents helped with the money, of course; and Will and Jem had gotten scholarships in their respective colleges, but they needed to work anyway.

They weren’t going to the same college, but that was hardly a problem. Their apartment was somewhat of an equal distance from both colleges.

They’d asked Jessamine, just to be polite, if she would want to room with them. Will decided that he could probably deal with her if she paid her part of the rent. After all, he’d been able to deal with her for the past six years for free. She’d curled her lip at Will. There was _no way_ that she would want to move in with them.

“I’ll find my own roommate, thank you,” said Jessamine. She then stomped off, probably to find her laptop.

Jem and Will had shared a look, then shrugged.

.

Even though he and Jem were going to be living together, Will feared that they wouldn’t see much of each other in between school and work.

When class did start up, it wasn’t as bad as Will had thought it would be. He didn’t have much time for reading anymore because when he wasn’t working, eating, or sleeping, he was studying. But as he lounged on the couch, staring at his textbooks, Jem would push his legs off the couch to make room for himself. Will would complain and moan before picking his legs back up and resting them on Jem’s lap.

“Your feet stink,” Jem would say.

“No one asked you to come sit here,” Will would reply.

It was perfect. Aside from the whole ‘studying’ thing. Absolutely.

~.~.~

Tessa knocked on the door of the apartment. A tall young girl the same age as Tessa answered it.  Jessamine Lovelace, the girl who had offered to share her apartment. She was wearing a flowing blouse and tight skinny jeans. Her makeup was immaculate. Her eyes swept over Tessa, taking in her dark t-shirt and pale, ratty jeans. Her eyebrows raised and Tessa felt self-conscious. Jessamine didn’t say anything about her wardrobe, though. She merely stepped aside and told Tessa to come in.

It wasn’t very heavily furnished, of course. It had a kitchen table, a sofa, a television set. It was quite empty, but that made it feel spacious and it wasn’t as if Tessa was going to be spending a whole lot of time doing anything other than study.

“Thank you for inviting me to room with you,” Tessa said, breaking the silence.

“As long as you pick up after yourself, we should get along fine,” Jessamine said.

“That won’t be a problem, then,” said Tessa. “I’ll start getting my things out of the van.”

Jessamine ran over to put on her shoes –comfortable flats. “Let me help.”

When they had finished bringing in all of Tessa’s boxes, the apartment looked much more crowded. Most of Tessa’s things were just clothes, shoes, and books, but she had brought along a kitchen set after Jessamine had said that she would be providing some living room furniture. Tessa had brought her bedframe and mattress as well as a couple of bookcases for her books.

Jessamine looked at all of Tessa’s books with distaste. “At least the apartment will look lived in.”

They spent the rest of the day organizing the apartment. Tessa and Jessamine crashed on the couch. Jessamine had cooked up some ramen noodles and the two of them were browsing Netflix for something interesting.

“High School Musical?” Tessa asked hesitantly. She didn’t know what Jessamine liked to watch, but everyone liked High School Musical, even if they said they didn’t.

“Absolutely terrible movie,” Jessamine said, and then she played it. They watched in silence for a few minutes until Troy and Gabriella locked gazes, and Jessamine groaned. “Why even start out the movie in black and white if not even ten minutes later it’s going to be in color?”

“Stylistic choice? To represent the whole soulmate thing, I guess,” Tessa said, then paused. She couldn’t see in color yet. It was all the same to her. “You see in color.”

Jessamine turned to her and regarded her in the same way. “You don’t.”

They didn’t say anything more about the subject that night.

.

It was a few weeks after classes at NYU had started. Although Tessa was overloaded with homework, she preferred that her time on the subway was filled with the words she would read for fun rather than for studying. Some older college students had told her that they used to adore reading, but now they struggled to find enjoyment in it because they had to read so much for class. Tessa refused to be one of those people. She flipped open the book she’d brought that day and continued to read where she’d left off.

She could only concentrate for two minutes before she realized that she felt eyes on her. Tessa tried to put it out of her mind, but she subconsciously made her body smaller anyway. She didn’t like to be noticed, and she certainly wasn’t in any mood for any advances. She just wanted to read from her novel before she had to pull out her textbooks at home.

But she kept feeling it. The stare.

“I’m sorry, but is that… is that _Cinder_ you’re reading?”

Tessa started and looked up. Out of anyone who she would have expected to have read _The Lunar Chronicles_ series, she would not have expected the young man holding the subway pole beside her. She pulled out one of her earbuds to be able to hear him better and nodded. “Yes, I’ve just started reading the series. It’s great so far.”

The young man, who looked to be about her age, grinned. He looked straight into her eyes. “It’s a very well written series.”

Tessa blinked just as the world sharpened. She watched so many movies that tried to show to audiences that could only see in black and white that particular feeling of finally finding your soulmate. She had read even more books that attempted to describe what she was experiencing right now, but she felt that she couldn’t. A single word popped up into her mind. _Color._

She didn’t think ‘ _Finally_ ’ the way Jessamine might’ve, but she did find herself out of breath. She had imagined it, meeting her soulmate, but she never thought it would be like this.

“Oh,” she said. “You’re –”

But the man seemed confused by what was happening. He blinked, and blinked, and blinked. He rubbed at his eyes, which seemed vaguely unsanitary seeing as they’d just been touching the pole. “This… this can’t be…”

She found herself tensing. Was there something about _her_ that he found unappealing? Surely the fact that she had been reading what she hoped would be one of this man’s favorite series would have scored her some favorable points?

“Is there something wrong?” she asked, her throat tight.

He stepped away from her. “I-I don’t understand.”

“We’re soulmates,” she said. She didn’t know why the boy looked so shaky and panicked. She was reeling with the revelation, of course; who wouldn’t be? But she was fascinated. He just looked… completely terrified. “My name is Tessa Gray.”

“I’m Will. Will Herondale.” His forehead creased. He still looked pale and shaky.“I’m already dating someone.”

Tessa tried not to let herself seem too disappointed. Of course someone as good-looking as Will would already be dating someone. She licked her lips. “Surely…”

“ _He’s_ my soulmate,” he said. He gripped the pole so tightly that his knuckles turned white. He looked like he was ready to fight anyone who said that he was not in love with whomever he was dating. Will honestly looked like he did not care whether he now saw in color. He _loved_ the boy he was dating.

Tessa felt her heart squeeze. Even these days where it was common, one had to defend themselves to people who thought that the love shared between natural soulmates was purer and healthier.

“I wasn’t saying that you didn’t love him,” she said. But in truth, she had no idea what she had wanted to say. Surely… Surely _what_? Surely his relationship wasn’t _serious_?  Surely he wasn’t _really_ in love with the man he was dating because they weren’t soulmates? Surely if Will would give her a chance, they would be happy together? Those were horrid statements, though. Completely untrue. And there was no way Tessa wanted to break up a perfectly good relationship.

The subway came to a halt.

“I have to go,” Will said, backing away. “I’m sorry, I have to go.”

Tessa almost jumped up to follow him out of the subway, wanting to talk more, wanting to clarify what she meant, wanting to _understand_. But the crowd going out of the subway and then coming in was too thick. A lump formed in Tessa’s throat. She would probably never see Will Herondale again.

She knew what she would have said, now. If Will had let her explain. Tessa took a deep breath and sighed.

She opened her book again, but her hands were shaking and her mind was too distracted with what had just happened to fling herself back into another world again.

~.~.~

About half an hour earlier, Jem had received a text from Will saying that he’d be coming home with takeout, so Jem didn’t have to worry about cooking tonight. That was good.  He was up to his ears in readings he had to do. He was sitting at the dining table, studying. The door to the apartment opened and slammed shut. Jem looked up, alarmed.

Will set down the bag of takeout on the table and shrugged off his backpack. He looked a little lost.

Jem set down his pencil. He’d been taking notes but something about Will was off tonight. He stood up from his chair and took a step just into Will’s personal space. “Will? Is something wrong?”

“Jem, something… something very strange happened to me today,” Will said. He met Jem’s gaze. His blue eyes held a hurricane of thoughts. Unfocused and flying a hundred miles an hour.

Jem frowned and pressed closer, taking a gentle hold of Will’s elbow. “What was it?”

“I… have another soulmate?” It came out as a question. Will was staring at Jem’s face as if seeing it for the first time. Jem’s heart squeezed. He wanted to keep that look in his heart forever. “Do you remember what I said to you, after we’d first kissed?”

“Oh, yes.” Jem smiled at the memory. That had been nearly two years ago now. It still caused a sort of twist in his stomach, remembering that longing. “You said that you could see colors that didn’t exist.”

“Exactly,” Will said. His eyebrows furrowed in thought. “Only… they do exist. I see those colors. I’ve been seeing them for at least an hour and a half. I met this girl on the subway and I can see so many more colors now, Jem.”

“What was this girl’s name? Who was she?” Jem asked.

“Her name was Tessa Gray,” said Will. “I don’t know much else. I ran from her. I was scared.”

Jem looked at Will for a moment before he gave a short laugh. “Scared? What for?”

“ _You’re_ my soulmate,” Will said. He stepped closer now, his arms snaking around Jem’s waist. His forehead leaned against his. “I love you. I knew that and everything seemed so simple, but now I don’t know. I don’t know what’s happening to me. Jem, what’s happening to me?”

“You have another soulmate,” said Jem, resolved. He pushed away any feelings of jealousy he might have had and just looked at Will. The only way through this was to talk. “Listen to me. Do you have this Tessa Gray’s phone number?”

Will shook his head. “I told you. I ran away from her.”

Jem let out a frustrated sound from the back of his throat. “Did you at least _explain_ yourself to her before running off?”

“I told her I was dating someone,” Will said. “And then she looked like she thought that I was dating someone who wasn’t my soulmate, so I told her that you were. Which is the _truth._ You are my soulmate; I could see colors after I met you. So many more colors than just black and gray and white. Only I think that she still thought that I was just being defensive. But I left right after that.”

Jem raised his eyebrows. “You _are_ being a bit defensive now. I’m well aware that you and I are soulmates.”

Will pulled him in closer without a word. So close, Jem felt as though he wanted them to fuse into one being.

“Oh, William,” he breathed **.**

Will was silent for a moment before pulling back. He didn’t meet Jem’s eyes and Jem missed the blue. “Could… this is going to be so hard for me to explain, but is it possible that I could be her soulmate without her being mine?”

“I’m not sure. Maybe. But that wouldn’t make sense if you said you can see colors that didn’t previously exist to you,” said Jem. “Obviously it means that Tessa is your soulmate, too.”

Will stared at Jem as though trying to find the answers in his eyes. He slumped forward, knocking into Jem, who had to step back to rebalance himself. “I don’t know what to do, James.”

 “Will,” Jem whispered, wrapping his arms around Will’s back. “You don’t have to be her soulmate yet. You can just be–”

“–her friend,” Will finished, snuggling his face into Jem’s neck and kissing it. Jem felt so warm at hearing the words he’d first shared with Will. His toes curled, much like a kitten’s when kneading their mother’s stomach.

Jem hummed. He pulled away from Will just far enough to not be tangled around him but close enough to lean in forward to give Will a quick kiss. His boyfriend returned it eagerly before Jem broke it off and turned to the food. “Let’s eat before it gets cold, now. We can talk about this later, all right?”

Will looked like the weight of the world had just been taken off of his shoulders. “All right.”

Will closed Jem’s books carefully and set them aside while Jem got out plates and eating utensils. Everything was good.

~.~.~

Jessamine was stretched out on the couch watching some mindless television and eating potato chips when Tessa entered their apartment. She dropped her book bag, and it hit the floor with a loud thud. She took in the familiar sight of the apartment, now shining with color. Tessa felt a lump at her throat again.

Why had she let Will Herondale get away from her? She had cursed it the entire way home. She would curse it for her whole life. Unless somehow they crossed paths again. She didn’t think that she would force it, but part of her wanted to. It tugged at her.

“What’s up?” asked Jessamine, crunching on her chips. She sat up, making more space on the couch. “You’re late. I thought that meant you’d be getting food, but you’re empty-handed.”

Tessa ignored her comment and asked her the question she’d been wondering for the past couple of weeks. “Why aren’t you with them?”

Jessamine frowned and turned to look at her. “What do you mean?”

“Your soulmate. The day I moved in, you said you could see in color. But you’re never with them. You never even talk about them.”

Something passed across Jessamine’s face –Tessa couldn’t tell if it was anger, embarrassment, or what, but the other teen licked her lips and gazed at her with steady eyes. “I don’t have one.”

“You… you don’t have one?” Tessa asked, taking a step back. How could it be possible that someone could see in color without a soulmate?

“Or I met them at birth, or very young, something like that,” said Jessamine, her voice rising. Definitely anger. “Because I can’t remember a time I didn’t see in color. My earliest memories are in full color. So as far as I’m concerned, I don’t have one.”

Tessa came a couple steps forward again, feeling strangely empty. She didn’t know what to say to such a thing. It was the strangest thing concerning soulmates she’d ever heard. What was she supposed to say? “ _I’m sorry”_ sounded feeble and Jessamine probably didn’t want the pity.

“What’s this actually about, then, Tessa?” Jessamine asked. “Did you meet your soulmate?”

She gave a short nod. “He ran away from me. God, I can’t stop thinking about it.”

“After all these years, I find myself not caring,” said Jessamine with a harsh laugh. “Even if I find them, I’ll never know it’s them. I already see color. So I just live my life.”

“I can’t do that,” said Tessa, going to collapse on the couch next to her friend. “I know who he is now.”

Jessamine was quiet for a moment. “He ran away from you?”

“Said he already was dating someone,” Tessa said. “Which is understandable. But—”

“Listen to me, Tessa,” said Jessamine, leaning forward. She had a fire in her eyes. “Do you honestly believe that soulmates should be together? Despite everything?”

Tessa’s stomach flopped. Before she saw in color, it was easy. The answer was no. After meeting Will, she wanted to know everything about him. She wanted to listen to him talk about books forever, and whatever else he liked to talk about. But Will _really_ loved his boyfriend. She’d never seen such a love between someone who wasn’t soulmates with their significant other, but it didn’t mean it didn’t exist. Will’s love for his boyfriend was proof of that.

“No,” she said.

“Then coming from someone who doesn’t have a soulmate, or will never meet them again, whatever it is,” said Jessamine, waving her hand as though she wanted the conversation to be over with. “You need to just live your life. You run into your soulmate again, or you don’t. You fall in love with someone who isn’t your soulmate, or you don’t. We continue to be roommates until we’re like fifty, or we don’t.”

Tessa was quiet for a moment. She could understand the logic behind Jessamine’s words. Part of her just didn’t want to listen to it. “I shouldn’t have let him get away.”

“You shouldn’t force these things,” Jessamine said. “When I was in high school I tried finding my soulmate everywhere I looked. It wasn’t healthy and it hurt a lot more than it helped.”

Tessa nodded. “You’re right.”

“Good. Now order some pizza.”

It was an order and not a suggestion. Good old Jessamine.

~.~.~

A week passed, and Will had kept busy. But as busy as he was, working or reading and taking notes for his classes, he sometimes still found himself thinking about Tessa Gray.

It wasn’t like with it had been with Jem. With Jem, he had –for the most part, anyway –been able to put the fact that they were soulmates out of his mind. He had known it, of course; consciously even, a lot of the time. Jem had snuck up on him so slowly. He’d been able to ignore it. He didn’t need to do that _now_ , of course. Six years after they’d first met, Will still found himself marveling at colors whenever he was with Jem.

But he didn’t know what to make of Tessa Gray. The fact that there were even more colors that he thought, the fact that she was his soulmate too, and that those were the only things that Will knew about her, both intrigued and terrified him. The idea that he didn’t have one, but _two_ soulmates was something that Will couldn’t quite wrap his head around.

Two soulmates. Why? And why now?

And who was Tessa?

It was confusing because he wanted to know, but he was terrified of it. He wanted everything to do with Tessa Gray and nothing to do with her at all. The feeling was impossible to put to words.

Will shook his head. He started up the steps to his apartment. His cellphone buzzed in his pocket, and he took it out and checked the message.

_> hey im throwing a halloween party can u and ur boyfriend come and not be disgusting for once_

Will grinned at Magnus’ text. He hadn’t seen Magnus in, God, at least six months. Magnus had moved to Brooklyn and even after Jem and Will had moved, too, they hadn’t been able to visit because they’d been so busy. But he wasn’t going to not show up at one of Magnus’ famous Halloween parties.

_> We’ll come but no promises on the not being disgusting._

He sent the text, then fiddled to get the keys to his and Jem’s apartment from his other pocket. His phone buzzed again, twice.

_> ugh._

_> >send u the address later_

He shook his head at Magnus’ response and put his phone back into his pocket. He unlocked the door and Jem’s music met his ears. It wasn’t anything he’d heard before.

He threw his stuff down, walked up behind Jem, looked over Jem’s shoulder at the sheet music, and remembered he couldn’t read notes. Jem had stopped playing. He gave Will a playful tap on the head with his bow.

Will grinned, but there was that feeling again. A sort of guilt, he thought. Because he was thinking about gray eyes and _The Lunar Chronicles_ and the fact that Jem’s music folder was red. He hadn’t seen red before. Even in these quiet moments when he was alone with Jem, he thought about Tessa.

He wished he could just enjoy this time with Jem without feeling as though he were _missing_ something. Will hadn’t ever felt like he was missing something before Tessa.

But then, Will had never felt like he was missing something before Jem, either. And now he could not possibly imagine life without him.

Jem tapped him with his bow again. “Earth to Will.”

“Copy that,” he said, kissing the top of Jem’s head. He stepped back and glanced at his backpack with dismay. “I have an essay to write.”

“You always have an essay to write,” said Jem, standing up to put away his violin.

“The life of an English major,” he sighed, shaking his head. “One day I’ll be free, Jem.”

“Free to _read_ the essays instead,” Jem put in.

Will groaned and Jem laughed.

.

The music was booming loud. Will and Jem had gone to Magnus’ parties several times before, so it was strangely something that they had grown used to. A countless amount of people in a dense crowd all over Magnus’ loft, dancing drunkenly, shouting, or cackling that shouldn’t have been able to be heard over the music, but was. Most were in Halloween costumes, like Will and Jem were. Normal ones like werewolves and vampires and ghosts and ghouls. Many wore ridiculous ones, too. Will saw someone dressed as a banana and a couple dressed as mustard and ketchup bottles. Some were even in cosplay.

Others were simply in T-shirts and jeans.

Will turned to Jem and grinned from ear to ear. “Would you like a cup of undoubtedly spiked punch?”

“I would love some,” said Jem. His smile wasn’t as wide as Will’s, but it was there, affectionate all the same. Will reached out to hold Jem’s arm and give it a small squeeze. Jem raised his eyebrows and rested his hand on Will’s chest before he could press closer. “No kissing now. We’ll ruin our makeup.”

He was, of course, referring to the face paint they’d put on. Even if there wasn’t going to be a costume contest, Will and Jem had wanted to kill with their costumes.

“Not even a little one?” Will asked, giving a little pout.

Jem tilted his head, pretending to think for a moment. “Maybe a little one,” he agreed. Jem’s hand that rested on Will’s chest curled and held a bit of the fabric, tugging him closer.

“I thought I told you two not to be disgusting,” Magnus said, coming out of the crowd. Jem dropped his hand, startled, and took a half-step away from Will, embarrassed. “In fact, I made those terms explicitly clear.”

“Aw, Magnus, you know we can’t keep our hands off each other,” said Will, moving so that his arm snaked behind Jem’s back and pulled him closer so that they were pressed against each other. Jem threw his head up to laugh and pressed against him even closer now.

“I’m aware,” said Magnus, but despite his serious tone, his amber eyes were lit with fondness. He cleared his throat. “All right, well, punch is in the kitchen, don’t drink too much, be safe, have fun, all those things. I have too many guests to be your chaperone.”

Jem and Will shared a laugh and Magnus left to go circle around as all gracious party hosts were supposed to do. Will told Jem that he was going to get punch, and Jem nodded in agreement, saying that he would just wait right there.

Will wove around people on his way to the kitchen. He served punch for both Jem and himself and took a sip of his cup. ‘Undoubtedly spiked punch’ was right, he thought with a smirk. It tasted like cough syrup but this was a party and one didn’t come for the good food.

Some girl dressed in a witch costume came into the kitchen and bumped into him. Will managed to save the punch from spilling all over them.

“I’m so sor—” The apology was cut off when the girl recognized him. Will recognized her too, though half of him had hoped never to see her again while the other half had prayed, _begged_ even, for it. “Will.”

“Tessa,” he said. He was starting to feel nauseous.

“You know Magnus?” she demanded.

“He’s a good friend of mine,” he said.

Tessa licked her lips. She looked good in the makeup she wore. When they’d met, she hadn’t been wearing any. Will had briefly wondered if she was one of those girls who never wore makeup. She was wearing it now, though; glittery silver eyeshadow, harsh black eyeliner, dark red lipstick. “You know we have to talk. You ran away before we could.”

“I told you everything already,” Will said. “I have a boyfriend, Tess.”

The nickname slipped out before he even realized it. Will hoped that she didn’t read anything into it.

“I know,” she said. “And I know you’re in love with him. But I’d like to…”  She trailed off, as though unsure of what she had wanted to say.

Will took a deep breath. “If you’re set on talking, then we need to get out of here.”

Tessa nodded and followed him as he made his way back to Jem, who appeared to be enjoying himself. Will padded up to him and tapped his shoulder, offering his punch.

Jem faced him and grinned. “About time,” he said, taking the punch.

“Let’s get out of here,” Will said.

Jem barked out a laugh. “We just _got_ here! And you’re the one who dragged me along–”

“Jem,” said Will, tilting his head towards Tessa, who was standing behind him. Jem looked like he understood immediately. They made their way to the door. Will hoped that Magnus wouldn’t notice that they were leaving. He’d send an apology text tomorrow.

Once they were far enough away so that they didn’t have to shout to be heard over music, Will clenched his fists and cleared his throat. Jem had been humming along to one of the songs and he stopped now. “Jem, this is Tessa. Tessa, this is Jem.”

“ _The_ Tessa?” Jem asked, turning to the girl standing beside Will. “Tessa Gray?”

Tessa swallowed and nodded, stepping forward and offering her hand. Her gaze didn’t meet Jem’s until he had taken her hand. She gasped and took a step back. Jem had tensed and looked around at the world as if seeing it for the first time. He met Will’s gaze and Will _knew._

Jem and Tessa were soulmates, too.

Will’s stomach flipped. He didn’t know what this all could mean.

But neither did Jem or Tessa.

“The colors,” Tessa breathed. She turned to Will. “You said… when we met, you said you and Jem were soulmates. I thought you meant… that it didn’t matter who your true match was, but you loved Jem anyway. That’s not true, though, is it?”

“Jem and I _are_ soulmates,” Will told her again, but it wasn’t with the same anger as he had said it before. “When we met for the first time, we saw color.”

“But not like how I see it now,” she said. Her voice was so quiet, as if she were only talking to herself.

“No,” Jem said, just as quiet. “No, this is completely new.”

“So, the three of us are…” Tessa said, trailing off.

The three of them stood together. None of them said a word. Though the city still lived; sirens wailed and cars honked, it seemed far away from them. There was a heavy silence over Jem, Will, and Tessa.

Will had never heard of such a thing happening, that one could have two soulmates. He had had some time to get accustomed to the idea, though he hadn’t expected to ever see Tessa Gray again. He wasn’t sure of how he would approach this. He doubted Jem and Tessa did either.

Things had gotten so much more complicated than they had been when Will was twelve.

“Um,” Tessa said finally, breaking the silence that hung over them. “I don’t think we should— I mean, I don’t want to just like, pretend this didn’t happen.” She looked straight into Will’s eyes. “I found you again.”

Will somehow found the words. “I know. I don’t… I don’t really want to, either.”

Jem glanced at Will in surprise. He knew it was probably the exact opposite of what Jem had expected him to say. But Jem wore a small smile.

“But,” Tessa continued, “I don’t really want to force anything, either. So let’s just… start over? Be friends, maybe?”

Will hesitated for a moment before nodding. “Okay.”

Tessa smiled and held out her hand for Will to shake. “I’m Tessa Gray. Freshman at NYU, English major.”

Will took her hand and gave it a shake. “Will Herondale. And, uh, the same. Though with a concentration on creative writing.”

Tessa brightened at that. “Creative writing? What is it? Fiction, nonfiction, poetry?”

“He dabbles in everything,” Jem answered, grinning. “He reads anything he can get his hands on. He’ll read the labels on food cans if he hasn’t got a new book. Which means he writes nearly everything, too.”

“I don’t read _everything_. I haven’t read _50 Shades of Grey_ ,” said Will with disgust.

Tessa broke into a laugh and Jem’s smile was brighter than the moon.

Her focus was on Jem now, her eyes curious and bright in the light of the streetlamps. “And what about you?”

“James Carstairs,” he said, shifting his feet. “People call me Jem, though. And I go to Julliard.”

“ _Julliard?_ ” she squeaked. Her eyes gleamed with interest. “What do you play?”

Will felt a burst of pride for Jem. He always did when Jem mentioned he was attending Julliard.

“Violin,” said Jem.

“Don’t you dare say that you’re ‘all right,’ Jem,” Will cut in, because he knew that Jem was about to act modest in the way he always did. “You just said you go to Julliard. She’ll know it’s bullshit.”

They both laughed this time.

“I’m the best violinist of this generation,” said Jem with a sly smile at Will. “Is that what you wanted me to say, Will?”

“Yes,” he replied. “I accept nothing less than the truth. I am sure Tessa is the same way.”

Tessa’s grin was from ear-to-ear, but said nothing for a moment. The amusement faded to a sort of mild contentment between the three of them, until finally Tessa brought out her phone. “I’m going to need your numbers.”

“Are you always so straightforward?” asked Will and Jem shoved him with his shoulder playfully and took Tessa’s phone to enter in his number while Tessa gave him a smile. He handed the phone to Will, and he put in his number too.

He gave the phone back to Tessa, who sent a couple of texts rapid-fire, making both Will and Jem’s phones buzz. Will brought out his phone.

_> it’s Tessa :)_

He left it as it was; no use in texting her back if she was right in front of him. But he saved her number to his contacts.

They stood in an awkward silence for a moment, not sure what to do now. Trading cellphone numbers was usually a goodbye and a promise to talk later, but the night was still young. Will wasn’t sure if Magnus’ party had been ruined for Jem and Tessa. He didn’t know if they wanted to leave. Even though it was early, far too many things had already happened this evening. Will didn’t even know if _he_ wanted to stay.

He was spared from making the decision by Tessa.

“I have to go back in,” she said. “I came here with my roommate and I can’t just abandon her.”

“All right,” said Jem easily. “We’ll text later, then.”

Tessa smiled one last time before turning away and walking back inside. Jem and Will were left by themselves in the chilly Halloween evening.

“Do you want to go back in?” Will asked. At this point, he would do whatever Jem preferred. He wouldn’t mind reentering the party, but he would also be content to go back home and watch some scary movies curled around Jem.

“Magnus might be upset that we didn’t stick around,” Jem said.

“We can visit him another time. He’ll understand. Forget about Magnus, what do _you_ want to do?” Will reached out and touched Jem’s upper arm.

Jem’s shoulders sagged. “I think… I want to go home. This was a lot to take in. Though I feel bad for getting all dressed up only to be here for half an hour.”

It shouldn’t have been funny, but it started a laugh out of Will anyway. “Selfies fix that feeling.”

“For you they do,” Jem teased, starting to walk to the subway station.

Will matched his stride and elbowed him, defending selfies to his grave.

~.~.~

Jessamine leaned heavily on Tessa as they headed home. Tessa had no idea how much alcohol content was actually in Magnus’ punch, but Tessa had mostly stayed away from it. She was supposed to be Jessamine’s DD. She didn’t much mind. That punch had been vile.

“You left the party for a while,” Jessie said, looking up at her. Her eyes were glazed and her breath smelled of alcohol. Tessa knew that Jessamine would be complaining of a hangover tomorrow. Hopefully it wouldn’t be too bad.

They made their way up the stairs of their apartment building.

“I did,” Tessa confirmed.

“With two guys,” Jessamine said, grinning in the way that teenage girls did when they wanted their friends to spill every detail.

Tessa coughed and nodded, feeling her face heat with something like embarrassment. “But it’s not what you think.”

“No?” Jessamine asked, laughing. “Tessa Gray didn’t have a threesome with two tall and probably very hot boys at _Magnus Bane’s_ party?”

“It was my soulmate,” Tessa said, then paused. “Well. _Soulmates_. Plural. I guess.”

Jessamine wrinkled her nose. “What the _fuck_?”

A laugh burst out from Tessa before she could think to stop it. “I _know_. I’m kind of… thrown for a loop about it, too.”

Jessamine was quiet as Tessa unlocked the door to their apartment. But after she went in and collapsed on the couch, she raised her eyebrows. “So you have _two_ soulmates?”

“Apparently,” she said, settling down next to Jessamine and turning on the TV to watch some old horror movie.

“Damn,” was all Jessamine said for a while. At least ten minutes went by, in which Tessa had gone up and gotten her a glass of water. Finally her roommate spoke again. “So what happened?”

“The soulmate I told you about before –Will– he said he had a soulmate. When I met him. I thought he meant something different, but he was quite literal, actually,” Tessa said with a laugh. “Tonight I met his soulmate –my soulmate, too, I guess. Jem.”

This seemed to shock Jessamine out of her stupor, if only for a bit. She almost screeched. “ _Will and Jem?_ ” She stared rather harshly at Tessa, and she didn’t know if Jessie was angry or just surprised or _what._ “Will Herondale and Jem Carstairs?”

“You know them?” Tessa asked.

Jessie took a long gulp of her glass of water, and set it down on the coffee table, empty. “ _Know_ them? Will Herondale! Will is my…” Jessamine had to think for a moment, waving her hands rapidly in annoyance. “Foster brother, I guess. We lived in the same house. He’s an absolute asshole. Jem is his boyfriend. They’ve been in love practically since they first met. It’s _disgusting_.”

Tessa was quiet for a moment, shocked. Small world.

Jessamine sank back into the couch. “And I thought your soulmate would just be some nameless, random person you’d never run into again. But the truth is that you would have met Will again eventually, huh? If I went back to Charlotte and Henry’s for the holidays and taken you. Not to mention the fact that you know Magnus, too.”

“You would take me home with you for the holidays?” Tessa asked.

Jessamine looked at her as though the answer should have been obvious. “Of course.”

“That’s… very kind of you,” Tessa said.

Jessamine nodded and got up. “Going to bed.”

She may have stumbled a bit getting to her room, but she was fine. Tessa was left alone at one in the morning in the living room, watching horror movies. Blood was actually red now. She was struck by that detail. It had looked brown, after meeting Will.

It was red after meeting Jem.

She shut off the TV and curled up in a blanket on the couch. She fell asleep there instead of her bed.

.

A couple days later, Tessa saw Will in the subway station on the way home again. She sped up to catch up with him. Will hadn’t texted her, and she hadn’t texted him, but Jem had texted her the day after Magnus’s Halloween party. They hadn’t talked about anything important, just asking if she watched some television shows or something or other. Trying to find common ground.

Now Tessa weaved through the crowd to Will.

“How is it that we go to the same school and I almost never see you around?” Tessa asked with a breathy laugh. She may have been sweating a bit. The weight of her backpack, the body heat of everyone around, and her running had all added up to her beginning to overheat. It also may have been that Will was here.

“Different class times, I think.” Will shrugged, looking surprised but not unfriendly. In fact, his blue eyes sparked with interest. Tessa marveled. The blue of his eyes looked different now after meeting Jem. Small things; the leaves of trees, the bright neon of restaurants and the blaring lights around Times Square –everything looked different and strange and beautiful after meeting Jem. She wondered if this was how Will and Jem felt after meeting her.

“Well, it seems as though we’ve gotten off of class today at the same time,” she said. “Want to sit next to me in the subway?”

Will grinned. “If there happens to be two seats next to each other available, then of course. Did you finish _Cinder_?”

“Oh yes, I’ve caught up, actually,” said Tessa, and she brightened now because this kind of talk was exactly what she was familiar with. Books, opinions on those books, opinions on the characters, the plot, speculation on what would happen next –these were all things that she lived to talk about.

Will looked like he was the same way, and he went on to ask her what she thought of the world-building.

Tessa answered everything he asked and asked him a few questions about the books herself. They were both going on and on about favorite characters and probably could have gone on for days together.

The screech of the subway breaks interrupted them. The doors opened and people flooded out and even more flooded back in, Will and Tessa included. Neither of them found a seat this time, but they both held on to the same pole and continued to talk as if nothing and no one else existed.

.

This became somewhat of a routine for them. They fell into it without even really asking each other. It was just understood that from that point, Will and Tessa would get into the subway and sit together, or stand while using the same handrail, until Will’s stop, which came before Tessa’s.

About two weeks after the Halloween party, as Will and Tessa were stepping onto the subway train, he asked her, “I know this is last minute, but would you like coming to have dinner at my and Jem’s apartment tonight?”

Tessa’s heart stuttered.

Before she could say anything, Will continued. “It’s just that Jem’s making dinner tonight, and he always makes a fuckton of food, which is good because there’s tons of leftovers and we’re both starving, broke college students. I wanted to invite you and Jem agreed. I told him how we ride on the subway together often and he asks about you all the time. I figured that I should stop being the middle man.”

“We text sometimes,” Tessa said.

“I know, but texting is different than talking in person and you’ve only met him once. Not to mention that it was for a very short amount of time,” said Will. He hesitated for a moment. “So will you come to dinner?”

There were a lot of reasons for saying no, or at least taking a raincheck. Jessamine was expecting her to bring dinner tonight, she had this essay that was due in two days, and the readings she had forgotten to do for class tomorrow. Tessa pushed it all away. Jessamine could fend for herself this evening and her homework could definitely wait. “I’d love to.”

Will beamed.

Tessa took out her phone to send a quick text to Jessie.

_> gonna be late tonight. Can YOU get dinner for yourself?_

“Fucking autocorrect,” Tessa breathed, then sent another text apologizing for whatever tone the text had taken due to the accidental all-caps.

_> fine. can i ask why u won’t be here? _

_> > Jem and Will _

_> >> fuck. fine. have fun I GUESS. still weird abt the soulmate thing imo_

_> >>>I know, same here_

Not that Jessamine could talk, with her own strange circumstances concerning soulmates. Tessa put away her phone.

This time when Will’s stop came, Tessa stepped off of the subway train with him.

.

Three things attacked Tessa’s senses the moment she followed Will into his and Jem’s apartment: the smell of food, soft music coming from iHome speakers, and the sight of books. The books were not that surprising. The apartment she shared with Jessamine had textbooks thrown carelessly everywhere. Jessie hated her. She liked to keep everything neat and tidy. Tessa was simply too busy reading everything to put things away in their place again.

There was sheet music on the floor, too, which Will kneeled down to pick up. He didn’t make any effort to organize them. He just stuffed them into a bright red folder and kept holding it. Tessa knew that Jem played violin but she couldn’t see the case anywhere.

“Jem! I’m home,” Will called. “Tessa’s here with me.”

Jem peeked out from what was presumably the kitchen. He was wearing sweatpants that had seen better days and a black T-shirt. Tessa thought he was beautiful. He padded over to them and gave Will a quick kiss. Tessa felt a bone-deep longing. She pushed it away. She had been the one to want to be friends, after all.

“I picked up your sheet music. I figured I should clean up a bit for our guest,” Will said, holding out Jem’s red folder.

“Sorry,” Jem muttered, taking it from Will and holding it to his chest. He turned to Tessa now. He seemed shy but genuinely glad to see her. Tessa could understand, because she was feeling a bit timid herself. “Hello, Tessa.”

“Will told me you’re a mean cook,” she said.

“Will thinks I’m good at everything, but the truth is I’d burn cereal,” said Jem. “But even I’m a better cook than Will.”

“As long as it’s edible,” Tessa said, breaking into a grin.

“Well, it won’t make you grow three heads, that’s for sure,” Jem told her. He glanced at Will with sparkling dark eyes. “Though his cooking might.”

Will darted forward as though to start a scuffle. Jem jumped just out of his reach and laughed his way to the back of the apartment, where he disappeared into a room for a moment and came back out without the red folder. It had been the bedroom then.

Jem was absolutely _not_ a terrible cook. It was better than anything Tessa could make, anyway. They sat at the table for a couple of hours after dinner had been finished, the conversation bouncing easily from one topic to another.

Tessa got home at ten in the evening and got very little sleep because she had a lot of readings and she had been determined to at least start her essay that night.

It was worth it.

~.~.~

Friday nights had once been Will-and-Jem nights; not much different than other nights before meeting Tessa. Sometimes during the week Will or Jem would have to work evenings and would only see each other in the mornings, but they always tried to make sure their Friday nights were free, even if that meant sacrificing an entire Saturday to standing on their two feet and dealing with customers at their respective jobs.

They weren’t Will-and-Jem nights anymore.

They became Will-and-Tessa-and-Jem nights. Jem dared to think that this was _better._

He didn’t often get to see Tessa on account of going to different schools, so this time on Friday nights playing dumb board games with missing pieces or marathoning Disney movies  was precious.

His crush on Tessa had gone in much the same way it had for Will; not exactly instant, but once he realized it, it became all-consuming.

Tessa sat on the couch between him and Will. They were watching _The Road to El Dorado_ and Will was singing along so off-pitch that even Tessa was cringing. She took a handful of popcorn and threw it at him. Will somehow managed to catch a piece in his mouth.

“Showoff,” Jem said.

Will took some of the popcorn that had landed on his lap and threw it at Jem.

“Don’t—” Tessa paused to toss some more popcorn at Will, with more force this time. “Bring Jem into it!”

Will stuck out his tongue at her and threw some back at her and then more at Jem. This started a full-out popcorn war between the three of them. They lost about ten minutes of the movie to yelling and laughing and throwing microwave popcorn at each other. When they were finished, the couch was a mess of broken pieces of popcorn and popcorn kernels.

Will shook his head. “If only you’d let me sing in peace.”

“ _You_ pick it up,” Jem said.

“Wha— Tess started it!” Will said, beginning to redden.

Tessa threw her head up and laughed. It sounded like almost like a witch’s cackle but it filled Jem with glee anyway.

.

There was a knock on the door, which Jem assumed was Tessa. She was the only one he was expecting, anyway. He opened the door, and there she was, shaking her umbrella. There were small droplets of water in her dark hair, which caught the light and glittered.

“Is it raining hard?” Jem asked.

“Not too hard,” said Tessa. She looked around the apartment. “Where’s Will?”

“He didn’t text you?” Jem allowed himself a smile. Of course Will had forgotten. “He had to go cover for someone at work today. He left in a rush. Guess he forgot to text you.”

Tessa nodded. She unzipped her jacket and made herself at home on the couch. She was comfortable enough around them to do that. Jem felt a rush of fondness. She patted her hair down as though to dry away the droplets of rain and looked at him with curious blue-gray eyes.

“Do you still want to go to the movie?” Jem asked, going to sit beside her. He was surprised by how nervous he was. He’d never been alone with Tessa before.

Tessa leaned back in the couch and smiled. “Of course I do. I’m glad it’s just you and me today, actually. I’m getting tired of Will chatting my ear off on the subway.”

“You should try living with him,” Jem told her, and she laughed.

Jem kept thinking of it as a date. He knew he shouldn’t. It was just an outing between friends. Will was originally supposed to come; they were supposed to be _friends._ But he couldn’t help it. He stared at her brown hair that she’d pulled up into a ponytail, her gray eyes, listened to her laugh at the shitty rom-com. She leaned over to whisper to him about how ridiculously predictable all these romantic comedy movies were and he felt a lump in his throat.

“I can’t help but watch them though,” she added in a soft voice.

He nodded.

They went back to his apartment and Jem managed to convince her not to leave.

.

He wasn’t sure how it happened. One second they were talking about the shitty rom-com they’d watched and the next his lips were on Tessa’s. Or Tessa’s were on Jem’s. Or –it didn’t really matter how. They were kissing.

~.~.~

Will opened the door to the apartment to find Tessa and Jem kissing on the couch. Tessa was sitting in Jem’s lap and one of her hands was tangled in Jem’s dark silky hair. Jem’s arms were holding her in place, firm but gentle.

He had not been expecting to walk into this scene coming home from work today. He and Tessa had been going on the same subway train home as often as they could, when their different schedules allowed it. He saw Tessa far more often than Jem did, yet here Jem was, kissing her first.

And Will was strangely not the slightest bit jealous. If it had been anyone else, he was sure that he would have been. But he mostly felt upset that he wasn’t part of this moment.

He watched them for a moment before he cleared his throat and closed the door. The sound made them both break apart. They took one look at him and burst into twin expressions of embarrassment. Tessa scrambled off of Jem’s lap.

“Will—” Jem began. He was looking between Tessa and Will.

“You are in _big_ trouble,” Will said, but he made his tone light and teasing. He paused for a second, to add some dramatic effect. He padded over to the couch and sit down next to Jem, who despite Will’s playful tone was tensed. He put his hand on Jem’s thigh and tipped his head to the side, looking past Jem to Tessa. “Unless…”

Jem had caught on to Will’s act and was grinning, though his cheeks were still flushed with color.  They’d known each other for six years and that was how Jem could read him so well, so quickly. Will could feel Jem’s muscles under his hand relax. Tessa, however, just seemed absolutely mortified.

“Unless?” Jem prompted.

Will smiled and met Jem’s dark eyes. “I get to kiss her next.”

Jem laughed and turned his head to glance at Tessa. “What do you say to that, Tess? Get me out of trouble with my boyfriend?”

Tessa let out a long exhale and gave a small nod. She leaned over Jem and Will met her halfway. Jem was touching his hair and Will had never imagined what this, the three of them together like this, would feel. It was perfect and he wanted this forever.

He hadn’t considered that Tessa wouldn’t be aware of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be a third chapter, of course. I thought I'd only need two chapters but I was wrong. Will there be a fourth? I hope not.
> 
> I was going to rewrite the Halloween party scene in Jem's point of view because we haven't gotten his point of view when actually meeting either Will or Tessa, but I got lazy. It's a 2K scene. No way.


End file.
